Walking with Giants
It seems such an age since my last instalment. Dissertation took lead then the exams and then the aweful 'odd' student job to catch up on my finances. Time has moved and much has changed.
My friends from school who always used to laugh at me for taking forever to complete my first degree will be happy to know that I now have one. It's a bit late to switch courses now as I've been graded and got the highest achievable classification - guess who's having the last laugh? I really enjoyed my final year. I seemed to have a greater sense of purpose in my mathematics. It really is the main reason why I'm off to the
Warwick Maths Institute this autumn. It's really a case of that I'm discovering how chaos theory and fractal geometry can be applied to the future projects that I will be working on. It's a tough asking - quite a lot of the new emerging financial mathematics questions the hard and fast rules which have been around for decades. I love questioning ideas - the answering part is what I can never get my head around.
The books I'm reading have been fascinanting. I feel as though I'm walking with giants in
Nature's Numbers by Ian Stewart,
Fooled by Randomness by Nassim Taleb,
The (mis)Behaviour of Markets by Benoit Mandelbrot... Thinkers of our time byond my imagination. Mandelbrot is an interesting character and his style is elegant and yet so amusing and incredibly informative.
I lost a million bucks today on the fantasy stock exchange. DRAT!! What's up with all the markets shrinking? Taleb calls it the
Black Swan - the next book on my list.
Life in lecture
As today’s end fast approaches, it’s as though I am closing the last chapter of my studies here and beginning the epilogue of exams. My final two hours of instruction were aptly on proving existence of some equilibria in nonlinear dynamics. Well, my life’s dynamic is at some equilibrium, possibly a fixed point or a cycle of daily activities which keep me busy, really BUSY!! (See
Poincare-Bendixson Theorem). I have a life, and it was all in my final lecture.
Scientific computing at one of the country’s top institutes beckons. The application is in, emails to the professor have been sent and references sought. I hope to find a way in (as they say!) because I’m talking about a top five mathematics school here, oozing with great minds. I feel I can do more justice to the stuff I covered in my dissertation. Maybe try and reinvent the wheel or something less spectacular. I remember how pointless high school maths seemed to be. It’s almost as though they save the best for last – it really is only making bags of sense now and I actually love it. I’m also into the interesting “new” mathematics with applications everywhere (hence the
scientific computing) and I could potentially find myself being in the company with one of my all time favourite modern science writers.
It’s all happening too quickly. A year ago I was only making it back from the US and now I’m contemplating another move. No rest for the wicked. But for now, I really must crack on and study hard from my exams. There's three back-to-back next week.
Who am I?
I may have grown up in the same Matabeleland province as parents, but my upbringing was a reflection of what they never had, or possibly would be been the stuff their childhood dreams were made of. They didn’t go to a pre-school that gave elocution lessons, or had the chance enrol in one of the country’s finest schools steeped in a culture of all round excellence. While my father in his youth may have had to bring the cattle home after school in rural Kezi, I had cricket and tennis in the afternoons and while my mother’s packed lunch may have been imbhambhayila (sweet potato) in her rural Insiza setting, I found the cold meats and salad lunch unpalatable.
Inasmuch as I may believe to be a product of a modern democratic Zimbabwe ruled by the black majority, I remain a minority. Few have been so fortunate to have a privileged upbringing in a country where poverty and social injustice is the norm. Now in university abroad, suddenly I am aware that I can hardly spell in SiNdebele or complete a sentence without borrowing a word from English. I daren't try read. I may have a Nguni name with such gracious meaning but then again I have to second guess what my first language is. I sometimes ask myself what language I actually think in.
So who am I? I am a product of those pedigree dreams which our African parents had for us - to be all they could never be. But it has turned us into mongrels, hybrids who can command an intellectual debate on western philosophy but shy away issues concerning the continent at present: AIDS, malaria, poverty, conflict and democracy.
Art, Music, Philosophy...
I’m busy running simulations on the other PC. I have an SA kwaito/house mix playlist going. I feel as though I’m on a serious work flow stream. It’s not yet hectic but I have already budgeted about four hours sleep for this coming week.
Deadline for my write is 2pm on Thursday. I can see myself fighting with the binder at 1.45pm and then tippexing out my misspelt name. Gosh, I love pressure. I’m one of those thrill seekers when it comes academics. The closer the deadline, the more I’m forced to think, the more my brain works, the better the work I produce. I speak from experience but I hope my tutors don’t get wind of this. We don’t want to jeopardise academic references et al. Ah well, it’s a bit late now. It’s been blogged.
I rather like the computational work I’m doing on the other PC. I’ve reached an interesting point in my short mathematical-career-in-the-making. I mentioned this in my last post. Well, it gets better. It’s part when the science goes out the window and in comes in the art. Tweaking routines, adjusting parameters, hitting the run key, waiting anxiously for an answer. Making the slight change here, fine-tuning another small bit, fiddling with something else, run again. Wait. Result. One more time… There’s ways of getting it almost perfect. That’s called optimisation but that will be in a completely different study and setting. Let me just get on with art!!
Thandiswa - Lahlumlenze is now jamming. Lost her CD (along with 80 others in a snazzy Napster case) on a flight to Joburg a couple of years ago! South African music from the new generation seems to be getting bigger and being recognised world over. The likes of Ladysmith Black Mambazo, Hugh Masekela and Miriam Makeba have left a strong legacy. Cape Town’s
Freshlyground has just exploded into the scene. If you haven’t heard of them, educate yourself or spend two weeks in the Cape.
HMV stocks their CD. That’s if it’s been sold out at
Amazon.I’ll be reading philosophy this summer. Kant, Russell maybe Giddens – we’ll see how that goes.
Writing hard science
I have toyed with the idea of being a science writer, some correspondent for some weekend paper discussing the intricasies of the things around us. I know I'm a bit wacky, possibly a bit nerdy too but it is a wish. I think I'd like it very much.
My dissertation has two crucial chapters to go and I've got to a point where my brain is refusing to work. I'm saturated and I find myself writing statements and arguments that contradict themselves. I love my subject to bits and I sometimes marvel at the small new discoveries that I make, especially the parts when mathematics becomes more of an art than a science. When you have to go with your gut and fine tune routines by simply playing around them. It's almost as though hard science suddenly becomes malleable so that one can reach optimal solutions. How small should my time step be? How many simulation paths should I take? I shant go on.
By the way, it's Easter. I need some chocolate. (How random!!)
Give me Wiiings
As I open my first can of Red Bull...
I’m trying to figure out how I’m going to survive the next eight weeks. My exam timetable has been published and I kick of my finals with Fluid Dynamics and end it all with Advanced Statistics. Suddenly, there’s this wave of restlessness over me and I feel rather pusillanimous about the whole experience. (Look up that word!!!) The dissertation write up is moving slowly – just try type out hundreds of equations in Word and see what I mean. It’s torture. I really should invest in LateX or MathType. That has to be done before next academic year.
I had signed up for this course with Education faculty this week but I think I might give it a miss. (I went to their building last week for the first time – a bit swanky) As much as I love teaching and think highly of teachers – especially Maths teachers, my academics mean a lot more right now. I can’t miss a day of lectures and three evenings of solid graft. I just hope I won’t offend them. I have considered teaching high school Maths but only as a career after I’ve had my kids and lost my hair.
My head’s buzzing with rush of the cans Red Bull I’ve just had. I won’t say how many as my loving girlfriend might kill me. Vitalised body and mind!!! Let’s get to work!
A fresh start
One would think that i had been evicted from cyberspace. My presence (or rather lack of) has been disturbing. Anyway, we shall pick up from where we left of. Now where was I...
The last time I was here I was busy with a massive career hunt! Well - actually, it's turned to more of a self-assessment exercise. Never mind the interviews I got or the shoulders I rubbed with in the City, I think I'm more atuned with what will make me ME for the next sixty or so years- save the bits that will eventually fall off!
I've rediscovered the joy of facebook and youtube. Sad, I know - especially at time when I'm under sooooo much pressure. It takes numbness away though. There's also some crazy South African comedian with a channel full of laughs. You should check
khayav out - and subscribe to him. Legend in the making. That camera I bought way back when in
San Francisco busted last summer and I still haven't gotten around to fixing it.
At present, I'm busy writing my dissertation. When I signed up for Mathematics instead of Law, I thought I was evading the extensive research and long write-ups. Guess I was so wrong. Coupled with all the research and writing, there's also the model building process in some programming language which understands statements like:
d1:=(ln(S1[0]/K)+(r+0.5*sigma^2)*T)/(sigma*sqrt(T)):
Let me not bore you with syntax. My supervisor can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Pity I can't. Anyway five weeks to go now.
I seem so lost blogging again. Um... what do I say next? Right! I'm putting through some applications for Graduate School. Unlike the job applications, I will not spam universities across the UK, cross fingers and hope one will bite. My advisors and powers reckon that I should be selective and exercise my power to chose. There was very little choice for me growing up. Options beyond our small little realm in Bulawayo were very limited. Now I have plenty. And so my friends, Romans and countrymen... I shall go forth and make a fresh start.
